It Really Was Weiner’s Weiner

by Katherine Scardino

In May I wrote about the seemingly overload of male "pigs” - defined as men who had too much power and not enough common sense. I asked you at the end of that post in Women in Crime to “stay tuned. I’m sure there’s more!” And, sure enough, along comes this weirdo Congressman from New York, Anthony Weiner. I admit that I did look at the tweeted photo of his covered weiner and was totally unimpressed. But, what makes Mr. Weiner interesting to me now is that he was sexting, which I also wrote about last February, asking how did we, as a nation, get to the point that having sex via satellite was, well, sexy?

Early on, when the scandal first became news for almost all breathing Americans over the last several weeks, I felt that he should stick it out (no pun intended...) and keep his job. He was elected to Congress by the citizens of New York, and I did not see that anything he had done was really any of my business - taking into account that sexting has become somewhat routine for a large portion of the population of the United States. I believed that if the citizens of New York wanted him out of office, they should do so by their vote.

Then, things got a little more serious. As I understand there were several tweets to various women that were more than a little suggestive. I have not read them, but I would love to read the words and form my own judgment as to whether they are truly offensive to the general public, and really, whether the general public has any business reading them or, for that matter, looking at any private photograph that he has tweeted to “friends." Do these stupid, irresponsible, personal acts interfere with his job? Did we all think the tweets were so offensive because he is a married man? And, married less than a year to a very beautiful, successful woman. Does that fact change anything for us?

I noted that his wife was not “standing by her man” in any of his comments to the press, and especially during Mr. Weiner’s press conference when he officially resigned his position. I read in an article recently that women today are not like the women of ten years ago or longer. Women no longer feel the need to suffer embarrassment and ridicule just because they are the “loyal wife.” Strong, successful women today look at these men and can actually make individual judgments about the stupidity of their husbands and decide they do not wish to play the game. I give you Maria Schriver Schwarzenegger as a perfect example. Granted, her husband, the Governator, committed acts that were a bit more serious than Mr. Weiner and his weiner. But, nevertheless, she did not even make an attempt at excusing him or standing with him at any public announcement. I, personally, commend these women. Sometimes, spouses do such irresponsible, illogical and basically dumb things that it overcomes any thought of loyalty.

But, I want to talk a little more about sexting. Would someone out there please tell me why sexting is a happening thing now and especially why is it occurring among our young people? Can they not find a bed? Or the back seat of a car, as I recall... (no more about that!) But, at least my transgression with a high school football star was in person and not via satellite. Is it because the younger generation has grown up with social media: emails, text messaging, IM’s, Facebook, Twitter and now Skype, and that all emotions in any kind of relationship are relayed via these non-personal methods? Is there anyone out there who still believes that a personal conversation is better when  it is actually personal? That sex is really better when it is done in a prone position of some kind on some sort of flat surface - and in the privacy of someone’s home, car, kitchen, back yard, pool, hot tub, floor, etc...

If we are all involved in the computer relationships, how much do you learn about being social and about interacting in society with another student, teacher, parent, employer? Can these kids even talk? I know a young man, now age 25, who grew up in his room in front of a computer. And no, it is not one of my sons! For years, he could not speak in person except for an occasional grunt. We had to learn which sound was a positive sound and which was a negative sound. Over the last few years, he has matured and gotten a little better, but it is still definitely troublesome for him to speak aloud to another human.

But, back to Anthony Weiner. For people in public office, I would imagine that satellite communications of all kinds are a godsend to politicians. Think how many people they can reach via email and other methods of communication - all without leaving their desk. The idea of sending a photograph of a private part was not envisioned by the creators of these new methods of communication, but it became too easy.

So now, ex-Congressman Weiner, you have lost your job and perhaps your pregnant wife as well. But, why was he railed on so hard? Dare I even mention John Kennedy? He had sex with any person with the appropriate equipment, and some even in the White House, his home where Jackie and the children also lived. No one said anything about any of that activity until after his death. Or, Franklin Roosevelt, whose true love was not really Eleanor, but instead her one time social secretary Lucy Mercer, with whom he carried on a 30 plus year affair. The list goes on and on: Bill Clinton, John Edwards, Rudy Giuliani, Newt Gengrich, Eliot Spitzer.  And, I have not heard any news reports for weeks now about Arnold Schwarzenegger. And, who - or where - is Mark Sanford these days? So, why the big deal about Anthony Weiner? What do you think?

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Sexting: How Did We Get Here?

by Katherine Scardino

Wikipedia defines sexting as the act of sending sexually explicit messages or photographs, primarily between mobile phones-- a combination of the words “sex” and “texting.” The term sexting was first published in Sunday Telegraph Magazine, a British broadcast newspaper, back in 2005. Most, if not all, states have laws against child pornography, so how can we allow sexually explicit photographs of our children to be sent across the Internet? And, more importantly, how and why is this happening?

Many states find themselves in a quandary about how to handle this issue. Teens sending nude pictures of themselves to each other is basically child pornography. If someone under the age of 18 takes a pornographic photo of themselves and then sends that photo to someone else, they are distributing child pornography. And, of course, the person who receives the photo is in possession of child pornography. These charges can potentially carry stiff criminal penalties. In some instances, the district attorney may determine that the acts involved in sexting constitute distribution or possession of child pornography and decide to prosecute. Others times they do not. Some states are interpreting the problem differently and coming up with various ways to deal with the problem, but it will most likely take a number of years for the laws to formulate and become even remotely consistent. 

In Texas, our state Attorney General has opined that adults with nude or semi-nude photographs on their mobile devices can be investigated and tried on felony child pornography charges. Teenagers with photographs of other teens aged 18 and under can be prosecuted, and face up to 10 years in prison. The recently proposed Texas Senate Bill 407 gives prosecutors an additional tool to use when prosecuting teens who engage in sexting by providing a more appropriate offense. 

Under Bill 407, charges for sexting for first-time offenders who are younger than 18 are considered a Class C misdemeanor instead of a felony child pornography charge. Those teen offenders, as well as their parents, may also have to participate in an education program. The proposed new law would also give teens the chance to apply to have the sexting charge expunged from their records. One of the good points of this proposed law is education. It requires school districts to provide information to students and parents including the legal and emotional impacts of sexting. If approved, this Texas statute would become effective in September 2011.

But, do you really think making parents go to some class to hear about their teenagers new “fun thing to do” and the evils of taking naughty pictures will make any impression on these kids? Is sexting going to be blamed on the parents? Surely there is something deeper going on here. Yes, parents need to watch over their children. Yes, parents need to teach their children to be responsible, law-abiding citizens. Do you think we just have kids who make dumb mistakes, or is this new craze reflective of the times? 

Sexting is simply a result of advances in technology enabling new forms of social interaction. Messages with sexual content have been exchanged over all forms of historical media. Newer technology allows for the recording and exchange of photographs and videos, which are intrinsically more explicit and have greater impact. But, one important risk to remember is that material can be very easily and widely propagated, over which the originator has absolutely no control. Once it is on the Internet, it is gone forever.

Sexting is popular with teenagers. It is a new thing to do. But it must be controlled. Whose job is it to intervene and make some changes? Is it the parents', schools' or law enforcement's job? Or a combination of all three? Obviously, in my opinion, all three must bear some responsibility. But, what bothers me is that parents get first shot at teaching their children morals, citizenship and respect. I cannot help but cringe at the thought of a young girl feeling so emotionally numb to believe that it is cute or cool to send a nude photograph over the Internet to a boyfriend, or just a friend, which is even worse.

We really should do something about this.

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Risky Business - Partying in Underwear Is Not Cool

by Cassie Nelson

In 1983's Risky Business, Tom Cruise made a high school boy partying in private in his underwear the stuff of Hollywood legend. Twenty-seven years later, a junior and a senior at Dr. Michael Krop Senior High School thought it would be fun to throw a "lingerie party," which amounted to a night of extensive promiscuity as teens partied in their panties. And, in 2010, there was nothing private about it.

The Valentine's Day weekend party was held at former strip club in a seedy neighborhood in Miami, Florida. The theme and surroundings encouraged teens to drink heavily, wear hardly anything, and act outrageously. The price of admission: $25, and all of the underclassmen at my school were paying.

In class, I overheard three sophomore guys describe what they would be wearing: “Red silk boxers, no shirt, and a bow-tie.” Boys talked about the abs they'd been doing every night so they'd look good for the girls, who'd hardly be wearing anything at all. One guy even said he would be shaving his stomach for the occasion.

Although they just wanted to go out and have fun, these young adults were either completely unaware of the possible repercussions of their actions, or they just didn't care. The day after the party, pictures of them intoxicated and scantily clad would be all over Facebook, the world's largest social networking website. Only when it affects them in the future will they realize what they've done to themselves and each other. 

"Sexting" is already a massive issue at my school. Every few months, pictures of a naked girl spread through the school within minutes, until everyone, whether they want to or not, has seen them. Most of the boys save them, either on their phones or computers. The problem never ceases because the girl is too afraid and too embarrassed to go to school administrators or police -- even in a case as severe as a boy secretly recording his sexual activity with a girl and sending it to all his friends. 

Sometimes, a girl sends her nude photos to one boy, a boy she probably likes or has feelings for -- only to have the boy send it to all his friends, who then sent it to all of their friends. If caught, they all could be tried on child pornography charges.

 Technically, distributing naked pictures of teenage girls under the age of 18 is considered child pornography. If caught, the boys or men could face jail time and/or have to register as sex offenders -- a burden they would carry all their lives. It doesn't matter if the girl took the pictures herself, or if the photos were sent to someone younger than 18. It's still child porn. 

The lingerie party photos, though sleazy, don't count because the girls weren't nude.

Neither I nor most of the other senior girls went to the party. Most didn’t want to be surrounded by the younger students. But some also understood that they'd have no control over whether pictures of them clad in skimpy lingerie spread across the the Internet. One of the people throwing the party was a girl in her senior year. Once the hosts began promoting the party, high school principals from all over Dade County contacted her, demanding that she shut down the party before anyone was hurt, in the present or the future. She refused, and on that Saturday night, hundreds of boys and girls left their homes in normal “mall attire” over the lingerie until they got to the doors of the party.

That, I later learned (and saw on Facebook), was when the street clothes came off and the craziness began. In lingerie and boxers, the girls and boys were unable to relate to anyone there in any sort of normal way. The mood of the party went from the regular, have-fun sort to a totally sex-centered atmosphere, heightened by drinking and smoking. I believe those who may have felt a little inhibited by the way they were dressed -- or not dressed -- used the drugs and alcohol much earlier and more heavily than others.

The photos that appeared online that night and the next day were disturbing. The party was at a former strip club, so the girls were dancing on the poles and bar, wearing next to nothing and drunkenly oblivious to the camera phones snapping their pictures. Even more unsettling is that some of those girls posted those images as their main profile photos -- the default photo anyone can see -- on Facebook. Apparently, they really feel that they need to look promiscuous to be popular. 

But while the fun is fleeting, the Internet is forever. What happens when they want to get into a good university? When they start looking for a job in their profession? When they hope to play a college or pro sport or teach for a living? These pictures could haunt them forever, hindering their potential for success in the real world. The real world is not the one portrayed on TV in shows and commercials where everyone is either trying to have sex, having sex, or talking about the sex they had or want to have. (Pictured above: Actress Vanessa Hudgens in cell phone photo scandal of 2007. Sources say she "learned her lesson.")

Lingerie parties are just a symptom of a society and a generation that has lost sight of what is important. Instead of doing crunches and spending good money on ridiculous stripper outfits, teens in other eras involved themselves in social causes. Today, one of the worst problems I believe we face is the sexual abuse of women, through rape, domestic violence, and human trafficking. The line defining acceptable behavior keeps receding from the moral boundaries  needed to protect women and girls. If we see ourselves as sex objects, how can we expect others to see us anything else?

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